I don't have orgasms anymore
For most women orgasm is quite unpredictable. By some estimates, as many as one in ten of us has never achieved an orgasm, and among those of us who regularly do, it happens in only about half of our sexual encounters.
Studies reveal that 70 percent of us never achieve orgasms during heterosexual intercourse (without additional clitoral stimulation). The orgasm rate is far higher for women who self-stimulate, either on their own or with their lovers.
An under-reported finding: Women and men still like sex even if they never have orgasms, because we like sex for lots of reasons, it turns out. Orgasm is really nice for humans, but not necessary for sexual satisfaction.
Sex at midlife comes with the added benefit of easing up on the orgasm requirement. So, if you haven't been very orgasmic in your life, a decline in orgasms will likely not cause you much stress. But if you miss your orgasms, there is plenty you can do to preserve and protect them.
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First published 01/13/2010 Last updated 02/15/2011
Learn more about this condition
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Learn how your body's changes affect your sexuality.
Understanding what's changing can help you keep sex enjoyable.
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Enhance comfort by caring for your vaginal and vulvar tissues.
Compensating for lower hormone levels means taking care of yourself.
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Increase sensation in genital tissues.
Taking more time, energy, and attention can re-awaken our sensations.
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Maintain tone in the pelvic floor muscles.
Exercising these muscles encourages circulation and strengthens orgasms.
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Build intimate relationships.
Having emotional bonds is essential for good sex after 40.


